PVLF 2025

Interview with Ishaa Vinod Chopra Author Of Finding Order in Disorder: A Bipolar Memoir

Ishaa Vinod Chopra’s memoir Finding Order in Disorder breaks mental health stigma, sharing healing through art, dance, and self-acceptance.
on Oct 22, 2024

Frontlist: What inspired you to write Finding Order in Disorder?

Ishaa: In the initial years, I used the medium of journaling as a means of healing and catharsis for myself, and I was completely unaware that it would culminate into a published book one day. However, after I kept journaling, and as my life unfolded over the years, the content also accumulated. I knew I had to share my experiences with the world because this was not merely my ‘individual story.’ The dangers of an individual story on bipolar disorder can be profound and lead to many misconceptions. This was an attempt to reduce mental health stigma, create awareness, and provide coping mechanisms that worked immensely for me. These include Art, Dance, Yoga Therapy and ‘Mad Poetry’. I knew my story, if told, would speak to many others. Several people have reached out to me today with their stories and feedback on the memoir. I also have families who have lived experiences with bipolar disorder and wanted to gain more insight about it from someone who is not so profoundly integrated into the medical model for another perspective.

Frontlist: The title suggests a journey toward finding balance amid chaos. How did you choose the title, and what does it mean to you personally?

Ishaa: My father proposed this title to me about a decade ago after only reading the first few pages of my work. This encouraged and motivated me to write more. I gained a sense of order amid turmoil by facing and deconstructing the disorder that had previously overtaken my existence. I am convinced that genuine order develops by managing chaos and allowing ourselves to fully feel it while absorbing the effect and engaging in meaningful introspection. It is critical to establish appropriate coping methods to deal with the suffering that frequently accompanies the condition, whether it appears physically, cognitively, emotionally, or, in my case, medically.

In my life, I seek order in disorder by writing, journaling, dancing, painting, researching, and actively advocating for mental health. I also believe that relationships are a key to survival as we are social beings. Today, we even have a Harvard study that proves the people who live the healthiest lives are the ones who have formed the strongest bonds. To that effect, I prioritize my close relationships, and today, that is with my husband Biswarup, parents, siblings, and close friends.

I also believe in ‘Pet Therapy’. One can label it whatever they want, but having the company of my pet dog, Dobby, has helped me cope immensely, particularly in the days when I could not fully maintain connections with humans.

Finally, to occupy myself, I post videos on my YouTube channel, ‘Ishaa Vinod Chopra: Dance Therapy Vlogs,’ where I do not dance solely to garner views but rather to enjoy myself through dance movement, which has proved to be a therapeutic hobby for me time and again.

Regardless of its form, disorder is universal in human experience. It's the fuel that ignites our inner drive to cultivate order out of chaos. Without disorder, we lack the impetus to embark on the transformative journey toward achieving harmony and clarity in our lives.

Frontlist: Bipolar disorder involves both extreme highs and lows. How did you capture the complexity of these experiences in your writing?

Ishaa: In my particular case, I did not experience as many lows. However, my memoir does capture the creative aspects of my highs, which are showcased in the paintings I created through some therapeutic Art sessions. Also, while I did take to the pen and write in my highs, these included most of the ‘Mad Poetry’, which I wrote in intense phases of energy and inspiration. I also used Dance and Yoga therapy as a coping mechanism to positively channel my energies, which I have described at length in the memoir. In the beginning chapters, there are also illustrations that I had made which describe how I felt about my parents, along with a visual of a ‘theory of intentions’ which I had drawn in my teens, during my highs in my very first episode and initial diagnosis.

Frontlist: Bipolar disorder is a deeply personal and often misunderstood condition. What motivated you to open up about your experience?

Ishaa: I often get enraged when I see some doctors post videos about what a particular condition means, especially ‘Bipolar.’ Most videos are highly generalized and create more confusion than clarity. Although they list a few symptoms, they are exaggerated and dramatized to gain view counts. This not only scares people who are diagnosed but forces them to self-stigmatize while increasing discrimination and stigma in society towards people with mental health challenges.

Most people think that people with mental illness are the illness themselves. By this, I mean the person is viewed by society as having the symptoms that define an illness instead of the unique personality traits that define them as an individual. I would encourage people with mental health diagnoses to rid themselves slowly of self-stigma and for others to function from a space of empathy instead of sympathy. There is a fine line between caring for others and feeling sorry for someone with a mental health disorder.

Another myth is that people with mental health diagnoses will not be able to be good parents. Being parents is a personal choice, and as a society or even as parents, we cannot rob the right of freedom of choice from our children who want to have children. For example, many people are discouraged from being parents because they deal with mental health issues. This not only creates trauma and stress for couples but can also trigger lower moods in some cases. There have been many instances, for example, where women who experience mood disorders tend to stabilize with the sheer joy and responsibility of being a mother. I cannot speak for myself; however, I dream of being a parent one day. Indeed, we should not generalize and use statements that demean individuals who cope with mental health issues. In rare cases, if a condition negatively impacts children, there are options for family or medical interventions.

These myths and misconceptions fueled my desire to make my memoir a reality and share my experiences.

Frontlist: Mental health awareness has grown in recent years. How do you see your book contributing to the ongoing conversation about mental illness, especially bipolar disorder?

Ishaa: I questioned if my memoir would spark the often-taboo conversation surrounding mental health and domestic abuse. Suppressing these interactions exacerbates the situation for both the patients and their families and fuels societal mental health stigma. I believe sharing real-life experiences may help to debunk common misunderstandings in popular culture. I felt a moral need to go out and normalize these themes to convey that it is acceptable to be 'comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Frontlist: On the occasion of World Mental Health Day, what was the most empowering moment for you in writing this memoir?

Ishaa: The most empowering moment for me in writing this memoir was the real-life and virtual interactions I have with people who are not only diagnosed themselves but impacted in some way or another by mental health challenges. Recently, I had a woman who is around my age who disclosed to me that, similar to me, she was diagnosed with bipolar at the age of 16, and her experiences of being institutionalized brought up many memories when she could relate to what I had shared in my memoir. She proceeded to say that she always hid her diagnosis and neurodivergence from everyone. Still, after reading my memoir, she was inspired to be open about it and smash the self-stigma that once prevailed and prevented her from acknowledging and accepting herself.